Respect Deserves No Applause
I wonder what happened to the days where you treat people
how you want to be treated. In all fairness I’m a little young to have
experience that age being a child of the 70’s. I didn’t see a lot of it growing
up but there was some left. However, I’m still old enough to know what respect
is, what it should look like and feel like and to be honest I’m not seeing a
lot of it lately.
For instance, I contacted an upwardly mobile person of
business and of some celebrity for potential business opportunity via the
internet of course and was given the viral cold shoulder. Now, in all fairness
I know they have people coming to them all the time with ideas and it could be
hard to vet who’s serious. I didn’t think I came off aloof but you never know
what someone is thinking or the opinion they formed about you based on what
little information they had.
I’m no outsider to the film industry; however I am clearly
not an insider in this person’s mind so the potential deal didn't happened.
Just for the record, this deal was something that would have benefited them
greatly and cost them nothing but apparently they didn't need any additional
benefit. Do I sound salty, sure and here’s why.
I think the lack of courtesy and respect is not a part of
American culture anymore. This celebrity clearly has courtesy or he wouldn’t
have advanced in life, but it just wasn’t reciprocated towards me.
Here’s another example. If you didn’t figure by now I’m an African
American male. Arguably, the most feared race judging from the nightly news.
One day, I was standing in the post office in a line behind several people. In front
of me was an older white male in his late 70’s, very frail looking. His wife, a bit younger, however still up in age came in
the door and stood behind me in line. She politely, asked me in a respectful
manner, “excuse me that’s my husband, can I”. I politely said, ”sure” and slightly
stepped to the side so she could pass. When she got in front with the older
gentleman, she turned to look at me asked, “is it okay because….” and she put both
her hands up and began shaking them saying, “cause I don’t want any trouble’.
I couldn’t believe what I was seeing. Here I am standing
here, minding my own business trying to mail a letter and I get hit with the whole,
“you violent black men stamp”. What! I’ve
never robbed anyone, sold drugs, used drugs, killed anyone, nor hurt anyone. I
know the 5’o’clock news showing all the shootings and killings going on in the
cities across the US are largely stories about black males, I get it, but don’t
charge every black man you see as being violent and doesn’t deserve to be
treated like they matter. I matter, that’s why God put me on this planet.
You think I’m complaining, try this story on for size, and
just for the record. I have tons of them. Many years ago, I was in video store
looking for a good move to rent. At the time I was living in upstate New York,
so this ought to give you some reference. As I was walking down the aisle, a 5
year old white child turned and yells, ‘ill”. Her father looked at me to get my
reaction just in case he had to jump into protective mode and try and kick my
ass defending his young child which would make for a great 5 o’clock news
story. The father said, ”honey everybody’s different”. If you heard him say it,
all I can say is you had to be there. It was the most awful sounding response I’ve
ever heard. You mean to tell me this child has never seen a black person
before, really. I passed three coming into the place. Question, is what they
are teaching this child at home. I’m not saying he was supposed to beat the
child, but responding in manner such as, “honey we don’t say things like that
to people, that’s hurtful honey okay. Now apologize to the nice man”. Clearly, a
5 year old won’t remember this when she’s older, but I will.
I’ve had countless offenses launch at me because of pre-judgments. People saw me, formed an
opinion and the need for respect was needed no more.
Many of us suffer offenses at the hands of colleagues,
family, friends, and strangers and quite honestly I’m hurt and offended by all
the very unnecessary acts of unkindness.
One word comes to mind when I think of lack of respect,
inequality. The celebrity guy didn’t respond, because he didn’t see me as being
his equal. I wasn’t a celebrity or someone or something he recognized. I was no
longer any value to him no matter if I could have added value to his life or
not. It’s a superficial stance but some people are just that way. Just to be
clear, I’ve work with many celebrities and business people and they aren’t all
like that, this is an example of one person in this article. I could list some
others but for time sake, we’ll stick to this person.
Inequality is dangerous.
A study has found that people will fight to their death once they’ve been shown
that they’re not equal and don’t deserve to be treated as humans with a God
given right to live free and prosper.
Hurtful, is what this loss of respect is all about. People
are hurt by subtle and not so subtle snubs, retorts, negative comments and
random acts of unkindness. Me personally
I’m sick of it. I’d like some respect for dinner with a side of apologies
please.
We’re in an age where people don’t want to be respectful
because it somehow makes you look inferior, possibly wrong and offensive. I
read a study that suggested that most people don’t want to look like the bad
guy. There are even teachings on how to get out of looking like the bad guy. I
guess there goes the respect.
If you’d like to support
my movies check them out below. See the youtube video to this article on my
channel Derick Thomas titled Respect Deserves No Applause.
Charm City©2006 is about 3 friends trying to make a better
life for themselves in the gritty city of Baltimore may have turn back to their
old ways when trouble hits.
Raising Wolves©2012, is about young black teens rites of
passage in a violent city can turn deadly.
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Peace and Blessings.
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